When Love Hurts: Signs Your Relationship Is Harming Your Mental Health

Being in love should be a source of joy, comfort, and support. However, relationships aren’t always sunshine and calm seas–even the strongest couples find themselves sailing through troubled waters.

Recently, the internet has been buzzing about a local celebrity couple facing marital issues. While we may never know the full story, one thing these public discussions highlight is how deeply relationship challenges can impact a person’s mental well-being.

Witnessing these discussions unfold can prompt many people to reflect on their own relationships: Is my love life helping me grow, or is it starting to drain me?

Tell-tale Signs of a Troubled Relationship

Here are signs love might be affecting your well-being and what you can do about it.

1. You’re constantly anxious.

A healthy relationship shouldn’t leave you feeling scared or always on edge. If your stomach knots up when your partner calls or you’re constantly bracing for conflict, that’s emotional strain, not affection.

What to do:

Be aware of your triggers. Find out what situations make you anxious.
Have an honest conversation with your partner about how their reactions affect you.

2. Your self-esteem is slipping.

When you start doubting your worth or feeling that it’s always your fault, it might be a sign that your relationship is chipping away at your confidence.

What to do:

Psych Central suggests communicating openly with your partner. Express your thoughts and emotions, including small concerns, honestly and calmly.
Surround yourself with people who remind you of your worth.
Set boundaries when conversations become hurtful or disrespectful.

3. You feel emotionally drained.

If being with your partner leaves you feeling exhausted, it can take a toll on your mental health.

What to do:

Identify what’s draining you—constant arguments? One-sided effort? Knowing your triggers will help you understand your own emotional responses, vulnerabilities, and needs more clearly.
Talk to your partner about the issues affecting your relationship and work toward a compromise. Don’t be afraid to express your feelings, but remain respectful and empathetic.
Prioritize your peace of mind by stepping back from stressful discussions or situations.

4. You don’t feel like yourself anymore.

When you find yourself toning down your real thoughts, changing your behavior, or suppressing the real you just to please your partner, the relationship may be overriding your personality.

What to do:

Revisit your old interests—music, hobbies, routines that feel like “you.”
Normalize sharing your thoughts and feelings—even small ones.
Ask yourself honestly: Do I like the version of myself in this relationship?

5. Your physical health is being affected, too.

According to WebMD, stress due to an unhealthy relationship can disrupt sleep and give you headaches.

Stress is also linked to smoking because cigarettes contain nicotine that stimulates the release of dopamine—the brain’s “feel-good” chemical. For some people, smoking becomes a temporary way to ease feelings of sadness or depression.

Constant stress is also linked to chronic illnesses. When you’re stressed, your body releases hormones like cortisol and adrenaline. This response is helpful for short bursts, but when stress becomes constant, these hormones stay elevated longer. This could result in high blood pressure, weight gain, high blood sugar, or increased inflammation, raising your risk for chronic diseases.

What to do:

Track your symptoms to know your catalyst for stress.
Schedule self-care time—sleep, hydration, and proper meals.
Prioritize activities that help you relax and recharge.
Talk to a healthcare professional if symptoms persist.

Final Thoughts

Love is meant to enrich your life—not drain your joy, shake your confidence, change your personality, or compromise your well-being. Although relationships have their share of ups and downs, they should not cost you your peace of mind. When it starts to feel heavy, confusing, or emotionally draining, your mental health may be taking a hit.

Here in the Philippines, conversations about mental health are slowly becoming more open, but the stigma is still there. Many people hesitate to seek help or even acknowledge their emotional struggles because they fear being judged or misunderstood.

That’s why it’s important to have reliable support systems and healthcare in the Philippines, like Medicare Plus. These resources help encourage mental health awareness and promote a more proactive approach to overall well-being.

If any of the signs of a troubled relationship feel familiar, take it as a cue to pause, reflect, and reassess your relationship. Remember that you are worthy of a love that brings out the best in you.

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